DMS writer

Mini Memoir Monday: The World’s Most Silent Prom Date

This week’s mini memoir was written by Deanne M. Shultz. I love reading her quirky take on life on her blog, DMSWriter. Click here for the original post.


Picture it: South High’s Senior Prom, 1983.

I never gave much thought to prom, seeing it as just a reason for the Hobnobbers to Hob Nob Even More. Then Mike asked me to the senior prom and I felt this strange compulsion to go.

Me and my big hair. Not really…

The hair issue was already decided – back then, Big Hair reigned, and to be otherwise coiffed spelled doom. But what would I wear? What about shoes? Did I need a purse?

My poor parents.

I just hadta, hadta, hadta have this $100 dress, which was a lot for them 30 years ago, but Mom bought it without complaint. It had a jacket with filmy sleeves, a gazillion buttons up the back and a cami-sorta-slip-thingy underneath.

As if there wasn’t enough lace on the dress, I wobbled around on lacy sandals, too. Throw in some big hair and a bunch of Aqua Net and I looked like stiffened baby’s breath with a wig on.

To top it off, Mike was a super nice guy, but we were oh, so wrong. He was on the honor roll, straight-A, destined for law school, and I had a hard time getting through Chemistry 1 without frustrating my poor teacher to the point of drinking over my inability to grasp redox equations. Poor Mr. Ahlf, but that’s another story…

A classic

Mike picked me up for the prom in his dad’s orange AMC Matador and the whole way to the restaurant, we didn’t say a peep. Nothing. For the whole meal, we didn’t talk. Nothing. The whole way to the dance, you guessed it –


The World’s Most Silent Prom Date had just been enacted. We got to prom, and my friend and her date were there, whooping it up and laughing. Clearly, they had agreed upon a Talking Prom Date.